New Blog Title - Fulfilled By Christ

Writing this blog is something the Lord has gently nudged me to do over the past year or so.  It created in me such a desire to write that at times it was overwhelming.  So after a time I created the blog and began to note some things as I felt like it. The topics have been extremely random. I was afraid to narrow it down. Sometimes I feel that I am so heavenly focused that I no longer know how to live here today. Now, please understand, that I am not saying I am perfect (or that I think I am). I am far removed from such thoughts or reality. However, my Savior has captured my heart completely. I am bound to Him in such a way that I fear that I might write about Him and His Word even if not called to do so.  Well, the time has come to submit to His service.  I have feared that I could not write anything that would glorify Him enough but I forgot His ability to use those who would serve Him. And for that I must ask His forgiveness.
So with that being said, I have renamed my blog.  My hope is that it will glorify Him.  That He will transform my words into His words. That something here would touch the heart and make a difference for at least one person.  I wanted to give an elaborate reason for the name and verse used. But truth be told, it would not leave me. God brought this verse to mind and would not allow me to move from it. And then I thought ~ how fitting. All that I could possibly share in the stretch of this blog could not be more than a taste. But a taste is enough for you to know beyond understanding that He is good and so many need His refuge. So if you are here taking your time to read this, my prayer is that you will get a taste of Him and find the refuge you seek ~ and that by Him you will be fulfilled.

Hope

It has occurred to me so many times over the past year that we live in a dry and thirsty land. As such, we are often robbed of something critical in our lives and that something is "hope". Without hope, what is there? Without hope, how could we possibly make it? At the end of the day when we lay down with our own thoughts and dreams, hope is everything pure and simple. Unfortunately, there is little in this world that offers real hope. In a second, dreams can be dashed, hearts can be broken and lives can be ruined. Even when we think all is well. . .that can change in a second. However, I believe that most people are already crushed to some and possibly great extent. It could have been any number of emotionally or physically destructive things that have happened in their lives. The person may be recovering (if a bit calloused) or floundering completely. None the less, dreams have died perhaps along with a bit of self and hope is lost. If we count on ourselves or this world, then that is the end of the story. Sure it plods on but it continues in the same sense of despair. Praise God we are not dependent on the hope we or the world can offer. 1 Peter 3:15 says, "But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;". Did you get that? It says, hope is within us. But yet we cannot depend on ourselves. This hope within us is different. It is, according to Colossians 1:27 ("To them God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.") Christ within you is your hope. The Holy Spirit living within you will give you hope where there otherwise there would be none. To know this hope, you must spend time with Him. It is the only way to experience the hope He offers while still on this earth. God made it so simple. . . we make it so complicated. His whole purpose for creation was to have a relationship with us. When we spend time with Him we begin to understand and He (by faith) gives us hope. A most beautiful treasure!

Nooks

One of my favorite possessions, no doubt, is my Nook. I started with the black and white version, then moved to Nook Color and recently to the new Tablet. So I wanted to share thoughts for those who might be trying to decide. Now these thoughts are for the basic user, not the techno geeks who will immediately make changes that Barnes and Noble would not be so happy with. First thing to note is that even with the more expensive versions, I have still missed the black and white Nook at times. For basic reading, it is definitely superior as long as you have light. It is easy on the eyes and the sun does not glare from it. The main reason that I went to the color is because it does not require a light to read. However, it is definitely harder on my eyes. So if you will be simply reading and always have light available black and white is the way to go. Now in addition to reading, the Nook color is wonderful for playing games. I have loved some Angry Birds on Nook Color. I have used it to go online when necessary but it is cumbersome at best. Recently, my husband so graciously acquired the Nook Tablet for me. It does everything the Nook Color does but has some extra features. It is a tad lighter in weight. Getting online is less cumbersome. It also comes preloaded with Netflix and Hulu Plus. Now you still must do the monthly subscription on these but it is impression that you can watch TV or movies on this small device. It also can be used for Facebook and other social media. Basically, it depends on the user as to which is best. But if you have someone on your list who is an avid reader. . . look at the barnesandnoble.com Nook. By the way, one last note is that I get many of my books free from www.christianbooks.com or www.barnesandnoble.com. Just check occasionally and grab them up when they are available. Hope this is helpful.

New Toys and Warranties

At a time of year when so many new toys are bought and many of them pricy, I want to pass on a hard learned lesson. This is the warranty lesson. We have always been ones to search for the best deal when buying most anything but especially something as big as appliances. Well we learned the hard way that price isn't everything. In fact, these days many stores will match the price from another making the price matter even less. So the talk goes to extended warranties. Now I am skipping the debate on their general value. Anyone who has purchased an appliance in recent years knows they do not last. All you need to do is read online reviews to be scared witless. So to get back on subject, read all the fine print on the extended warranty. Look at it this way, you will be forced to sooner or later. For example, when do they consider the product a lemon and simply replace it. We found on our Lowes extended plan, it had to be the exact same repair three times in the same year. Unfortunately, a lemon can have lots of problems and since the parts get replaced as the problems occur they can be different. Of all the plans we looked at, hhgregg.com and sears.com seem to be the best. Overall, I felt Sears won out. However, even the salesman had special instructions on how to get the best service which required involving him in the repair. Not sure how effective that would be long-term. I guess the moral is that none of them are great but some are definitely far better than others. So shop wisely this season.

Christmas Gifts

Every year we put so much thought into gifts for those we love. We spend hours hunting that perfect gift through a madhouse of people who have become ill tempered in their own quest. We give our hard earned money to pay for the cherished item. Then we bring it home and feel the delight as we wrap it with care. Anticipation builds as the day arrives and our heart nearly burst when the time comes to share the prize with the intended.Today I found a couple of those gifts and carefully did the wrapping. My heart was already full with excitement. Then it occurred to me. . .how much more must God be full of excitement to share His gift. That is the gift of His Son. The one He sent into the ill tempered world for one purpose. His purpose was to pay the price for the most precious gift of all. . .US. Yet so many of us have failed to accept His gift and those of us who have often don't understand the value or the responsibility. I pray that my goal this Christmas season will be to know the Savior more than ever before, cherish His gift like the prize it is, and share with some that need to know their gift is waiting too. Oh how that will make this Christmas the most special ever!

Christmas List

So it is that time of year. You know. . .the time we take the kids list and try to figure out how to make them super happy without going broke. That might even be a bit more challenging this year. Forget about the economy. How about ipads, iphones, ipods, and of course computers and gaming systems? Yep, it is all about technology. Problem is that technology is not cheap. That leaves us fighting crowds for sales and turning to the internet hopeful. So far for us Ebay has been a lifesaver or at least a Christmas gift saver. It is followed by Amazon as a close second. So thankful we can use this technology to help us find the hopeful Christmas gift.

Life on a Moving Sidewalk

I have been feeling a bit introspective lately and so many thought emerge from that thinking. One is that life is always on a moving sidewalk. I think when we go the right direction on the sidewalk our journey is easier as the sidewalk helps us get to our destination. However, it is so easy to get turned around on the sidewalk. A close relationship with the Lord (one in which He speaks to us and we head in His direction) goes in the right direction. Going in this direction is not without obstacles and even heartache. The world and Satan assure us of that. Still yet, even as Christians, we are bad to get turned around. When we are turned around, even on a good day, the journey is exponentially harder. Just imagine going through an airport in the wrong direction on a moving sidewalk. You would be working harder to make progress even when the path was clear but often it would be cluttered with those headed in the other (right) direction. It would cause frustration and confusion at best. Now imagine that a mountain came up. A health problem, parenting difficulties, spouse difficulties, betrayal by a friend, loss of loved one and the list goes on. Now you are going up the down escalator. Carrying all your baggage and fighting against those going in the right direction. Life is so hard. It will be full of trouble, strife and loses. The only help is to constantly move in the direction of our Savior. He is our only true help. Now knowing all that full well, I still find many challenges and many pertain to the times we live in. It has become hard to even find truth in daily life. The world has become so deceived. Thus making it hard to make discussion on small things and nearly unbearable trying to make big discussions such as parenting. I am not always good about filtering "today" with the Bible. But I have noticed lately that it seems that no one does. There are parents that don't worry too much (they will turn out fine and return to what they have been told) and then those that are very restrictive (healthy boundaries are good). We are the later in case you weren't sure. Yes, we know that may rebel but no we don't think we should change. After all we live in a time when watching shows and movies with demonic and occult are the norm. Where teens having premarital sex hardly gets a second thought. Why have we decided that we can't change the world so we will blend? Why have we become so weak minded? I am not sure if we are lazy or if we think that is not the Christian way. Remember Paul in the Bible. He was not weak minded or willed. He also was successful and prominent. Yet, He gave everything for Christ. He took a stand when it was nearly impossible at times.

Favorite Things. . .

I haven't blogged in a while and I just know you have missed me. LOL! Today I have some favorite things on my mind. Rather than having lots of stuff, I like to have quality items that can go the extra miles.

1) Alegria Shoes - These literally go the extra mile. When shopping for a new pair I often hear people comment on them being ugly. I guess they do kinda grow on you. I remember sorta thinking that same thing. Then I bought a pair. Well, for a year and a half I have worn almost nothing but Alegria Shoes. My favorites are the Paloma style. I have several pairs of these. I bought these shoes comfort but they have become about style as well. The mary jane style goes well with so many outfits. They add a little height with a hill and lots of pizazz. Now recently I jumped right outside the box and bought the Sedona Shearling Boots. Simply love them. No doubt they will cause my Palomas to get lonely some days. I typically wear a size 7.5 and wear a size 37 in both of these styles.

2) Cooking gadgets! Love, love, love to cook. Having the right gadgets and fresh ingredients make all the difference. My Kitchen-aide Mixer and Food Processor are big number ones! I love shopping Amazon and just looking through their vast collect of kitchen doodads. And don't forget a cute apron.

3) Hair Color but not just any. I am a do-it-yourselfer and proudly so. I used to think it was one of the worst chores. Then I discovered John Frieda form hair color. This stuff is amazing. I am finally able to color my hair without making a huge mess. The smell is pleasant and not overpowering.

4) NARS Blush. Not sure how to explain this one. I guess the pigment is just better. But I feel like I have a more natural glow. Plus it is easier to control how much blush I want for that day.

5) Burt's Bees Lip Shimmer was meant for me. It feels great and has a great touch of color. I love the Rhubard.

6) Today another hands down favorite is Ebay. Yes, there are some things that aren't my favorite about Ebay. But you can find anything and if you are patient you can find an incredible price! Hum. . . what could I look for tonight on Ebay?

7) Oh, I was about to forget a very favorite thing! My Nook Color from Barnes & Noble!!! Being able to carry lots of books in that one little tablet is amazing (especially on vacation). Did I mention I love to read? The selection of books is crazy. I have yet to run into something I wanted that wasn't available. I also often download books from Christianbooks.com. But if you happen to be tired of reading you can also download an app to play a game or many other fun things. No wishing for something to do with this neat little device. I am betting it will be the most popular Christmas present this year.

Stay tuned for my growing list of favorites! I also welcome comments of some of your favorites.

Realities

Recent challenges have brought to mind lots of thinking about who we do business with. We went through an ordeal where a dishwasher leaked. So here are so leftover thoughts that might help others.

1) Pull out all appliances occasionally for signs of leaking. Leaking can come from any part of the appliance and not just houses and connections.
2) Do not assume that the repairman will fix and not possibly cause more damage to your appliance.
3) State Farm Insurance has been fantastic but our broker completely failed to do her job.
4) Never buy another Frigidaire appliance. We have far too many repairs and incredibly non-existent customer service. They do not care and will not help.
5) This one is hard because we have bought appliances at Lowes for many years. They always get us the best price. However, the Lowes extended warranty is a waste of the paper it was written on and in fact caused more problems and expenses. No one else would stand up to take care of the dishwasher because it was covered under warranty and yet the warranty would not cover it either.
6) We live in a time when no one wants to take responsibility for anything. It is incredibly difficult to find anyone who works hard, cares, and will do their best to do the right thing always.

Tomorrow, Tomorrow. . .

I have waited for some time for tomorrow to come. It is finally the day I go to a new Rheumatologist. I am so nervous about this appointment. Often we talk about win/win situation. Well, this is a loose/loose situation. I loose if he doesn't know what is going on or give me medicine that will truly help. However, if he does give a diagnosis then I loose because reality often stinks!

I know that not many people ready this and maybe not even the same person twice. But if you have stumbled upon this blog and are a servant of the Lord Jesus, then please pray. I truly know that in some way this is a blessing but none the less I feel like I am standing at one of those intersections where your life changes forever.

Getting Ready

Today is last week day before I go to the new doctor. Yep, Monday is the day. I so hope that he has wisdom beyond his own and can help. The swelling in my hands is getting worse. Each night when I lay down to sleep, the pain and swelling are so apparent and it makes me wonder what damage is being done even then. I know that worry is from the enemy. So I try to put it out of my mind. This situation along with other life struggles has made me wonder. . .how many around me are suffering when people never know. Have you ever sat in a room full of people and wondered how many are struggling. Maybe it is at church. Maybe they even have their smile on. You know what I have found. . .people are even more determined to smile when they don't want to complain. Hum! So perhaps the ones that are physically or emotionally hurting the most are the ones that always have a smile for you. So I want to challenge you, next time you are in a group stop and think. Take time to really talk to someone and ask them how they are really doing. You might be suprised.

Blanket Statements (or thoughts) and God

I think so often we try to put God in a box. To make Him simple.  But yet how can we think the God who created human life with the intricacies of the body out of dirt is simple?  The answer is that He is not.  I believe that is one reason that we can continually learn from Him. While here on earth there is nothing new under the sun, but Isaiah 55:9 says "As the heavens are higher than the earth so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."  Whew that is a good thing and all this time I thought I knew it all! Not!

Not so long a go, I thought why is it people think they "get" God more when they have trials.  Maybe that means they didn't get Him before.  Because after all,  I know how to be humble (I am not always but I know how). Just being honest here and didn't that sound really humble?  After thinking this thought for a while, I even said something similar but more humble sounding out loud to someone! Yikes!

Well, I guess God decided it was time to teach me.  Slam. . .sick.  Now what.  Oh, I have had lots of pity parties.  Just finished another one.  Just saying.  But the truth is that I am seeing God different. I am seeing life different. I am seeing people different. I am seeing priorities different.  Now just to be fair with myself, there were other trials in which I just felt deeply betrayed and hurt. During that time I never felt closer to God. Oh my goodness, I think that was judging and anything but humility.  Something I have noticed about humility is that as soon as we realize we are humble then we are not.  Yep, that's right.  Because how can you be humble and be thinking oh I am so humble. That makes me so proud of myself.

Life is hard. Really hard. There are so many challenges, but remember that this is just temporary. God has so much more for those who believe and accept the free gift His son, Jesus Christ, has given. Fortunately, we don't have to come to him perfect for if we work on being humble to the Father then He will perfect us. Praise God! I definitely need lots of that.

My prayer for today is that I will seek to be truly humble.  Not only is this what God requires, it is where I find peace, love, comfort, etc. I want that so much.  Thank you God that my simple little mind can't begin to understand.  Please continue to teach me, oh Lord.




 

Back to School

Today was the day!  We began classes for 2011-2012 school year. For one of our children, this will be the last high school year.  Amazing!  The new year fills me with such anticipation, hope, and excitement.  Curriculum is still be tweaked, rules are still being made and the learning has begun.  Despite feeling rotten, I am excited to see what the year brings.  I just know it will be great. 

Thinking about Loneliness

No I am not feeling particular lonely.  I think today has just been too busy to even think about how I feel.  But someone dear brought it up and it got me thinking.  These days we are so busy with life and we fill our time with anything and everything. Yet so many are so lonely.  Ever been in a crowded place and maybe even among those considered friends and realize that you are so completely lonely.  It is such a devastating feeling. I admit that I have been guilty.  I have even been with my family and realized how completely alone I am.  Yuck. Why?  

I wish I even thought this answer was simple. I really don't think so.  On one hand, it very possibly is a lack of a true relationship with Jesus. The Bible says, " If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.  If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me." (Psalm 139:8-10) 

Do you hear that? Wherever we go He is there!  Not only that, but nothing can separate us from Him. "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter. Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerers through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:35-39) 

If you know Him and you still feel lonely. . . take time to dwell in Him.  When He knows you are humbly before Him then He will wrap Himself around you.  In that moment, there will be no loneliness.  How incredible it is to KNOW beyond KNOWING that the Father of the Universe is with you and not only with you but within you.

Oh Lord, thank you.  Thank you for your love, your friendship, your correction and that I can always count on you. 

Do you know Him?

Today is such a beautiful and blessed day!  It is blessed because the Lord Jesus wants you to come to Him today.  If you are not following Him, He wants you.  If you believe you are a Christian, than I ask has your life truly changed? Has it truly been handed over to the Lord.  There are so many who believe He is God for even the demons believe.  But the Bible says many will go to the gates of Heaven hoping to get in and He will say "I never knew you".  Oh how heartbreaking that thought is.  We have been so privileged in the US and I fear that it is keeping from bowing before the one true God.  The God of the Bible. The God that gave His life for you. Yes, I said for you.  He would have given His life for only yours.  I urge you to put your face to the ground and seek the Savior.  If you already know Him as Savior then seek Him as Friend, Father, Living Water, or whatever else you need.  ANY need you have He can fulfill. He wants a true relationship with you today!

Busy Day Today

Boy has it been busy today.  I did pretty good too. Just don't tell anyone I took a nap (LOL).  Any way big news is that I bought jeans!  You have to be female to understand what a wonderful statement that is.  I have gone from a size 8 to a size 4 since being less than well.  That is definitely a silver lining.  Love it, love it, love it!

So great and wonderful things for today!

1. New Jeans!


2. Brain Stimulating Work!


3. Nap!


4. My next doc appointment was moved up to the 22nd.  Which means hopefully I can get help soon!


5. Good day with kiddos!


6. Great date with husband and daughter this evening!

All in all, I call that a great day!  Thank you Father for giving me some great and wonderful things. Okay. . . now I am done. Good Night!

The Yuckier Side of Life

I remember so clearly thinking I was pretty much invincible.  Young strong and many years of young and strong ahead of me.  A good many years back I dealt with Endometriosis (Stage 4) ending in a complete hysterectomy. Otherwise, I have always enjoyed good health.  About a year ago that began to change. First I was just tired and than it began to hurt to sit (I thought it was a previous little hip injury).  My lower back hurt but it radiated down my legs.  Unfortunately, it has not been short lived. A year later symptoms have progressed and I still don't know the cause.  Here is my current list:

• Fatigue - It is not uncommon for it to hit a few minutes out of bed.  I often feel like it is stealing my life.


• Overall pain and soreness. I think this is muscle but not sure. I know that sounds odd but I am too tired to figure it out. LOL


• Joint stiffness and sometimes pain. This primarily in my hands, feet, legs, hips, and sometimes shoulders.


• Inflammation everywhere. 


• Dry mouth and eyes.


• Strange rash on lower legs that seems to become much more noticeable with heat (ie: sun or warm bath).

Looking at me. . .I don't look sick.  But I definitely am.  It has in many ways halted my life.  I don't sign up for stuff at church or commit to do much of anything for fear I won't be able to do it. I don't call friends because I don't want it to be a call about what is currently ailing me.  I hate being the sick one. It suits me better to serve the sick one and pray for the sick one.  Next time you ever tell someone you will pray but then quickly forget your promise, remember that it may next time be you.  Pour your heart out to our God who answers all our prayers. That person you promised is counting on you.

What to do about it. . . Well, I am getting ready to go see the second Rheumatologist.  So far pretty much all of my blood work has been normal.  Vitamin D was critically low some time back.  I had a spinal MRI that showed arthritis in my lower back.  Now I am pretty much at a loss.  I just wait for someone to notice that little detail that makes them say " a ha"! Just take this and get on with life! LOL!

So all of this yucky stuff is one reason I caved in to doing this blog.  This gives me a chance to share without burdening family or friends.  Perhaps no one will read the blog especially if there are many whine fest days like today but that is okay too. I am not really writing so someone will read. I am writing because I must!

So the first day I told you about my faith and lest you think it means any less due to being sick. . .I must comment on that.  How has being sick changed my view of Christ being in control? NOT AT ALL! At least not in the way you might suspect.  It has definitely changed me.  Things that once got me in tither. . .don't any more.  I see things more clearly in some ways.  The things of this world are passing.  It is but a short time.  (note to self: It is but a short time. HA).  Nothing in this day took God by surprise.  He knew every detail always and forever.  The Bible also says "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." (Rom 8.28).  Not that it always comes easy but Christ said. . . "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor 12.9-10)

It just makes me want to burst out in song and that my dear friend. . .you do not want to hear.  Good thing you are reading this and not hearing it. LOL Thank you Father that you are enough for even the worst of days or situations.  I love you so!

A New Venture

I guess the nothing ventured nothing gained idea applies here.  I have been considering for the longest time writing this blog.  I always have found reasons why not.  For example, it will take lots of time. . . but my life is private. . . what would I find to say.  Well, the idea has pressed upon so much lately that I finally caved.  I hope as I write someone will find something useful or interesting.  As I write here are some things you might read: 1) About my Faith.  Jesus is my everything! Nothing else really matters in the end.  Yes, I love my family and no I am not depressed.  I just know beyond knowing that my Savior is Jesus Christ, His word is true, and He is why we exist. 2) Sickness.  Yes, I know that is depressing but maybe it will help others.  Plus I believe that many can relate in one way or another. 3) Crazy little stories.  My dreams are often more vivid (I think) than most.  I forget them in a day or two but have often thought that could be developed into something.  Be ready for the strange! 4) My family.  Yep, they will make it here.  At the same time, what you will not find is names or anything that tells who we are.  I know, holding on to the privacy.  But it is my way, to have freedom in writing this blog. Anyway, I am looking forward to this little journey.