Self-esteem Continued - The Tongue

The research for the last post has continued to be a blessing to me. God has been so good and so faithful. Through His word, He has made changes that I could not make.  He is so good to us when we look to Him.  Being on stable ground (LOL), has allowed me to change my position a bit. I have been watching for signs that someone is dealing with low self-esteem.  Of course, my primary specimens are my family since my world as a homeschool mom is small.

So this is a look not at our personal self-esteem but at how we effect the self-esteem of those around us.  I have noticed that it really can be the smallest word, action, or lack of either. So as not to give away all the kids secrets I will be the example again with a little help from my husband.

I started working on a project yesterday that my husband had been after me for a long time to do. It was pushing my field of knowledge and therefore made me nervous (failure is not my friend).  I spent a good portion of the day learning about this project and figuring out how to go about it. I thought my husband would be so proud. He being very practical and technical minded cut right to the first potential problem. It deflated me immediately. I felt done, over, finished.  Now I guarantee that he still doesn't know or understand what his words did. He was simply pointing out a problem.  Yes, he could have gone about it much differently but I knew, as I was reacting, that I was over-reacting. Then boom. . . self-esteem busted.  Thankfully, Jesus always has the last word and He gently reminded me that my feelings were not reality.

I tell you this not to criticize my husband but to say we must guard against the damage we can do.  Each of our children have varying levels of self-esteem but any one of them can be leveled with a couple words.  Our words are so important. Proverbs 12:18 says, "There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing." Did you realize that your words have the ability to damage like a sword thrust of to bring healing?  Proverbs 15:4 confirms this even more saying, "A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit."

I encourage you, beloved.  Think before you speak.  How will your words impact those who hear?  Even when some guidance is needed, then how should it be done?

Lord, I pray. . . "Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips" Psalm 141:3